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Sunday, July 1, 2018

On the fly

Hello, ☺️.

I had the idea to check in today because I haven’t for awhile. But I know what it is like to have a blog I follow and for it to disappear, and it’s like a voice I was looking for and had found was suddenly gone. I think that’s the beauty of social media; not that people come and go, but that you can find someone whose thoughts you find resonate with some of your own, and that you can’t always find in the people you meet. Actually, if you met me on the streets, you may not even think I’m the same person, like one of my friends who I knew in real life that read something I wrote one day and couldn’t believe it. It’s funny! I wasn’t offended. I don’t speak as clearly as I write somehow. There is something about the paper and the slower pace that allows my soul to speak directly. It’s the best of me that you are getting on the page.

I love to write. I really do. And love to see when something I’ve said motivates another. It’s like my own mission I feel I have been given. It comes as a surprise because I wouldn’t have even been able to tell you what I actually thought about anything 20 years ago. It’s been a combination of philosophy courses, mentoring, and prayer that have lead me down this path of self-discovery. And in a way, a writer needs an audience. So you may look for my voice, but I look for your presence, to know that what I’m saying is important to you. We are mutually helping each other. And unlike people who don’t read me save a very few, you know me best, as I want to be known, so thank you.

Monday, March 26, 2018

Big Family

Big families

Why do we do it? Have so many kids? What is it like? 

I can tell you it’s much like your family of 1 or 2, because kids are kids. They all need love, affection, to learn self-control ( there is a wide spectrum of allowance here!), and have antics. Much the same.. and yet entirely different.

The answer to the first question is simple, and even though it’s the most common, I’ll get to it.

What is it like? It’s mad chaos. Constantly. Unless some of the kids are absent. Imagine a scenario where you have no inhibitions, so any idea that comes to mind is a possibility! You make it happen immediately because you are a child and so, impulsive, and a fort is begun or a game of chase is started or you put underwear on your head because you need that to be a ninja. And then your best friend comes along and adds their own infinite ideas to the equation and it’s a snowball of activity, growing in size and intensity. Times 5. 

But then you fight. And you’re mad. And some take your side and then again, some don’t. And that makes you madder. And you end up in time out. Which makes you mad. 

Until someone totters over with a ridiculous face and you can’t help but laugh, or sit with you in your fury until you both start playing quietly. 

And there is someone who can’t resist your cuteness and reads you a book or teaches you to draw. And you adore them for doing so and soak in their attention. And someone who will sit with you when your blood sugar drops and you feel funny because they know instinctively that you might need help. Or someone to make make a movie with you, even if you have to bribe them, because you are their sister, after all. Or someone who will help you build your 1000s of piece LEGO set and do it all day if they have to, because that’s just how they are, and you know it. 

I write from a kids perspective, because thats what keeps me sane when I see the house that is never tidy, the laundry that’s never done, and the bed that almost never sees me for a full nights peaceful rest. I have to see it from their eyes, because otherwise, I won’t be strong enough. 


So why do I do it? It started with Faith trusting a higher intelligence than my own. And it has ended and runs on love.